Reflective Journal – Entry #6
The prison management system had faults, and I was not registered to enter. Pras and Erika were away, had to sit in the visitor center one hour to understand what to do, to be allowed to move and go “doing my job”.
At the beginning felt so angry (discomfort), then realized inmates should have been in such situations so often; depending on other to make one move, and waiting, only waiting, powerless.
Waiting: very big and important learning for me.
Session: Folding Techniques
Then Joey (textile professor) comes in and Connor (the young industries workshop guard) help us preparing the Origami Textile workshop; he stays with us because we’re only two, and we have around 10 guys.
Lovely lesson, everybody having fun and engaged (even if a little bit frustrated); the folding techniques were prepared and some guys included in their own prototypes.
Before leaving I checked with on Wayne, and he tells me that we could do something else than common feedback. “I do not want others to steal my ideas, designers or inmates – I prefer keep it to myself and share it later on”.
When asked what makes him feel such way, he answers he’s an addict, hence he is and always will be selfish, he’ll want everything for himself. Then he stops and adds: “Maybe I can do something good with it” and I agreed, giving him examples of how selfishness is positive. I thing my examples were not strong enough…
After Connor releases them, with Joey we discuss some cases, and they mention Bradley who assaulted a guy to defend his girlfriend; Jamal who was an accountant and got into a fight and was made an example for the rest of the community.
Anger. Waste of years, people, money, everything.
Pain. Because. Injustice. Not Fair. Anger, Frustration with the system. I almost broke down there.
Connor is a good support. He’s proactive and the guys respect him and are happy to learn from him. It was lovely to have him in class, he’s sweet and kind and firm, and can be much of a role model to them (and a way for them to understand not all guards are shitty), as people like Andre can be.